It is exactly a
year to the day that lovely Mr KT (aka Dave) passed away during his much longed
for liver transplant operation. The first few weeks
after his passing I felt as though I was lost in a kind of "fog", shock mixed with raw grief I suppose. Hence it did take me a while to get going
again with KT Miniatures, but...slowly and surely life began to move forward with the help
of family and friends.
Suddenly and very quickly (like so many others thrust into the same position), I have had to learn to deal with problems that I'd never
had to before in all my 36 years of marriage. Mostly because they were Dave's area of expertise and he would automatically sort them. Probably to date, the most challenging have been technical problems
with the computer and KT Miniatures' website, and all things to do with my car! But I am learning and have surprised
myself in what I've been able to do.
One of the best
pieces of advice from someone given to me after the funeral was to
keep busy...and I have been doing just that. Ok, occasionally grief has a nasty
habit of creeping up when I least expect it
but it passes, and the secret is definitely not to sit and mope, but to get out
there and do something.
And although it hurts
like mad that he missed his daughter's graduation ceremony last autumn, that he missed a son's wedding this January and
was not here to share in the pure joy of our first grandchild recently born or
indeed the impending birth of a second grandchild soon to be born...life does
feel so much better now.
Dave was naturally a
very positive and optimistic person
right up to the very end, he used humour to help him and me cope with his prolonged illness, even in his darkest hours. What is rather nice is that we as a family can smile or chuckle
when we talk about him now.
Thanks once again to
everyone for your kindness and friendship given over these past few surreal
months and for your continued support to KT Miniatures.
I think at last we are well and truly on the up at this end now, and life seems a lot more rosy:)
CeliaX
10 comments:
So glad to hear that. Wishes for continued growth and more than a little joy.
Un duro trance pero veo que tienes mucha fuerza y tu nuevo espacio de trabajo lo has dejado fantástico. Felicidades por el aumento de la familia ,seguro que
que Dave estará muy feliz .Buen día :-)
An inspiring and wonderful post and the perfect tribute to our much loved, and much missed very special friend.
Thinking of you all
R & R xx
Hello Celia,
I am glad you have been surrounded by happy events. It might hurt that he is not there to celebrate them, they give you something to live for. Keep on being strong...you have 2 grandchildren who need their grandmother ;)
Big hug
Giac
I am glad you are learning to cope even though it will catch you sometimes - and that is to be expected and sadly part of the deal of grief. I'm sure Dave was with you all (in your hearts) in the lovely family milestones you've enjoyed this year, just not physically there as you would all wish. Your friend was right - keeping busy is one of the best ways of learning to cope and crawl out of that awful fog of loss, I've certainly found that strategy useful over the years with the death of various very close family members including my parents when I was young. Perhaps that is why I am almost always busy, sitting doing nothing is not my thing. I expect Dave would be very proud of what you've achieved this year despite his loss.
Many thanks everyone for your kind comments. Celia
I just saw this, Celia.
You know you and your family are always in my thoughts and i am happy to hear that things are on the up for you New babies are such a joy and help to heal the wounds of loss. Dave would want you to take his share of the enjoyment of all the positive things that are going on for you now.
Wishing you all the hapiness you deserve,
Jenni xxx
Aww...thanks Jenni. Celia x
Hi Celia, I lost my dad last year after a short illness and it was a big shock for us as we all thought he would get better. He and my mum were going to be celebrating 50 years of marriage just a couple of months later so my mum has been going through exactly what you have be going through. Thankfully she has some great friends who have kept her busy and she seems to be coping much better now.
Take care of yourself.
Diane xx
Hi Diane. So sorry to hear about your dad and is good to hear tht your mum is coping much better now. I don't think any of us, no matter who we are or who we have lost, ever get over losing a loved one, but instead we have to somehow learn to live without them. Keeping busy has certainly helped me. Celia
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